Exhausted State of Mind

I'm so tired. It feels like I'm dragging my soul behind me, shackled to my ankles. My soul wrinkled and deflated, drags behind my heels sluggishly. I try coffee, but my soul resists, still lax at my feet. My eyes wince from the glow of the computer screen, the brightness too much for my weakened …

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Being Invisible

The problem with living as an invisible person is that you aren't actually invisible. People can still see you. They still require things of you. The first thing I do every morning after getting the kids off to school is turn off all the lights. Depending on the time of year, I also cut off …

The Problem with Eating

The problem with eating is when you're having to battle a mental hurtle to consume the calories that it takes to live another day. I've been having a few "Bad eating" days. The bad part isn't junk food... it's the lack of wanting to eat at all. I'll be STARVING, look at our fully stocked …

Riding the Cycle of Almost Getting It Done

My goals for 2023 were: Stream 4 days a week, publish book 4, write a blog once (maybe twice) a week, focus on my physical health. So far I've been focusing on my physical health, blogging when I remember, perpetually almost done with book 4 and I have streamed once in over a month. I've …

What it’s Like

I'm tired. So tired. Exhausted on another level. My brain fogged over and my body decided it was time for eternal rest.... although I still breathe. I'm just so tired. I'm tired when I wake up, I'm tired when I lay down. I'm so tired that being tired is just an undercurrent of every other …

Reframing Fitness as Physical Health for Mental Wellbeing

There is A LOT of toxicity in gym culture and by proxy, diet culture. So much so that I googled, "fitness memes" and it took me twenty minutes before I could find one that is humorous without being down right degrading to either the person in the picture or the reader. After years of working …

Unwell but funny

Burn That Bridge

TW: Cheating Seventeen year old me tried to break up with my boyfriend so many times. He literally avoided me or straight-up ignored me while I told him to get out/never come back. I was hearing from many sources that he was hooking up with randos at his house on the weekends but then trying …

Today is a ‘Bad Focus’ day.

I've been spiraling for well over a week now. To cope I've thrown myself into writing my fourth book, going out for a walk and incorporating meatless meals to the dinner rotation. Oh, and I'm counting ounces to make sure I am drinking enough water. I'm actually using my Fitbit for more than just a …

Hyperbolic Inertia: Emotional Dissonance

Yay, math and big words! I've already scared some of you away. I hope you actually stay though. I had this thought this morning while I was trying to accomplish fifteen things to get to my "I need to do this"... thing. (See, I'm not so dry and educational after all! Mouth gibberish is what …