You made it! You did the thing! You survived the holidays. You swallowed the stress and just let things happen around you. Or maybe you didn’t but you’re still here anyway? Either way, HOORAY FOR US!
Now we’re in that pocket of space where some of us go back to the daily work grind while others are home with the kids wondering what day of the week it is. The pace of at-the-job workplace may be funky so everything feels surreal. If you’re like me you’re completely overwhelmed by the amount of trash and clutter is on top of your usual clutter. I panicked yesterday and threw out half of my son’s room. (It’s okay, he appreciated the clean room and with Christmas he is not lacking in toys.)
I cooked for the first time in over three days. It took me an hour to unbury my kitchen to be able to cook but it was worth it. It was a routine action. Sometimes I let the dishes pile up for days before I wash them out of protest. I’ve had such heavy meals lately I’ve been craving a salad with very little toppings. Lettuce, I just want lettuce…. the cotton candy of savory foods. Very little effort. Just leafy goodness. Too bad we don’t have lettuce.
I’m trying to be motivated to do absolutely anything at all. I’m picking up trash every time I walk to the kitchen but it never ends. I guess with kids it doesn’t really end until they go back to school. I need to pack the tree away and organize the big computer desk. I want to start a knitting project and finish writing the fourth installment of The Java Tavern Series. I’ve started reading The Historian and it’s finally getting interesting. I have tooth pain that is out of this world. Half of my face is swollen. My nose keeps bleeding from the dry air and lingering cold symptoms.
Mentally I’ve been struggling but only in the way of doing anything for myself. This includes this blog, writing my book and going for my thirty minute walks. Everything that is “selfish” for myself has been put on hold for the holidays and I’m more than ready to revisit my interests. My laptop is a problem. It struggles with running a word program. It doesn’t stay on if it’s not plugged in and shuts off on me if the plug comes loose, which is often. So I don’t want to be on it. I’m even writing this on the large “house” computer that I stream on usually. I’m uncomfortable in this chair, it feels like work. I don’t like writing to feel like work. So… that’s my problems. My problems are never considered when things get purchased for the house so here I am. Even with a very successful vendor season that money was spent elsewhere. I do have a new phone though, so as soon as I figure out how to log into my TikTok account, I’ll be making videos up there again and on YouTube shorts!
And blogging… I need to start blogging again. Writing this blog is as close to meditation that I get these days.