[SPOILER ALERT! I avoid big pivotal spoilers, but address a lot of the complaints/bad reviews and explain my opinion of those bad reviews which may describe full scenes of the movie. Reader, beware!]

First of all, I didn’t have high expectations of this movie because the original movie is more of a nostalgia porn trip for me and not exactly a cinematic masterpiece. To be fair, I’m more of a TV Show addict than movies. Movies tend to be more “Men making movies for other men” while Television has always been geared towards women. This listicle helps represent why I feel this way. This movie was very woman-ceneterd and I loved it. The first movie was silly in a lot of ways and the second movie leaned into the silly openly.

Anyway, the opening scene is an amazing view of the Sanderson Sisters as kids. Rapidly we see how Winnie ends up with the book and how she plans on using it. This gives the sisters an origin story. Some people were upset that there were discrepancies in how the origin story happened versus how it was told by Allison in the first one. Urban Legends always have discrepancies, this wasn’t a miss-step in writing, just simply correcting lore with “facts.” (Although none of this is real because it’s a feel-good spoopy fantasy movie, but I digress.)

We meet our main character biking into school. It’s a teenage girl with not-white skin! Huzzah! Her friend, also not-white joins her, and then OH NO! Their uncomfortable conflict character is white! I can see why some racists have problems with this and “Didn’t make it past the first twenty minutes” is their excuse. Get over yourself. Honestly. If you’re mad that non-white characters are taking the lead in these new movies you’re already not worthy of happiness, mmmk?

The fact that a WITCH movie upset a bunch of conservatives just did something inside of me. Is this… satisfaction? Yes, I think I feel satisfied that this movie ousted a lot of racist homophobes. Current media has been good for that lately and I’m dancing in their blood as they fall on their swords for their hatred. The LOUDEST people saying “don’t see the movie it’s bad” are because they were offended that a gay couple sat on a couch in the comfort of their own home (They weren’t even touching) and that the main characters weren’t white. They want to scare you away from normalizing normal people. Don’t let them do that.

I’ve seen some reviews start with, “I like it, I just wish…” and those aren’t the people I’m coming for in this review. I wish we saw Max and Allison make a cameo in the apple line or even in the magic shop. I wish there had been another Binx character, but there wasn’t. There are a lot of “I wish” statements I could say that don’t change my opinion that this movie is enjoyable and entertaining. We can still dream about what we would’ve done differently in the movie and agree that it was a good movie. Is the movie going to win numerous rewards and clean house at one of those award shows? Probably not. Is it a movie I’ll add to my rotation for when I wanna see something “fun but spooky”? Absolutely. It gave me Halloweentown vibes (some of the scenes are just silly) while still holding true to the core Hocus Pocus values.

Izzy (Belissa Escobedo), Becca (Whitney Peak), Cassie (Lillia Buckingham)

I loved the twists and turns in this movie. Oh, the feels! The G R O W T H of all the characters. Being a teenager really is the pits and they really brought that back in the second Hocus Pocus. This movie kept the attention of my nine-year-old but my seven-year-old got bored and went to bed. This movie is geared more toward tweens, teens, and adults that loved the first one. Also, apparently, it’s not for people who hate humanity… so there’s that.

If you get a chance to watch this movie, do it! Don’t expect to be blown away by ground-breaking humor but you shouldn’t feel disappointed by the movie as a whole either. You also need to check your emotions before watching the movie. As I said, I can only watch the first one when I’m in “the mood” for it and maybe the second one lands the same way for a lot of us too? LOTS of “easter eggs” to find! I’ve been hearing that some people enjoy it more on the re-watch and I’m here for that! Hint: skip to the end of the credits for a surprise!

HAPPY SPOOKY MONTH, WITCHES!!!

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